Today, I was remembering when you danced at Saturday Club to Pari Who Mein. You were so graceful and watching you dance was watching a transformation. Seeing a regular person transformed into a work of art. The grace in your moves was stunning. You made it seem so easy, like all great dancers do.
When I came to see you in October, I remember how graceful your hands still were. I remember feeling clumsy. I felt overcome with clumsiness, like a cow stumbling along, saying the wrong things and doing the wrong things. Being wrong. I think it had something to do with knowing you were going and not knowing what to do with it.
It all felt so wrong and clumsy and ugly.
I remember you telling your mother, that the cancer will take your legs. I couldn't believe it. The legs of such a graceful person. How could life be so unfair?
I feel like a bumbling food now. Somehow I feel like I have lost all my grace too. I am cognitively clumsy. I was never physically as graceful as you. I have always had cognitive grace though. I can't concentrate. My memory is shot and my attention span is nil.
Today I was chopping onions while remembering you dance, and I started bawling. And I know why. I am seeing your sister tomorrow. Tomorrow will confirm that it happened. You are no longer here and no matter how many letters I write to you. It's over.
You have no idea how painful that is.
I love you.
When I came to see you in October, I remember how graceful your hands still were. I remember feeling clumsy. I felt overcome with clumsiness, like a cow stumbling along, saying the wrong things and doing the wrong things. Being wrong. I think it had something to do with knowing you were going and not knowing what to do with it.
It all felt so wrong and clumsy and ugly.
I remember you telling your mother, that the cancer will take your legs. I couldn't believe it. The legs of such a graceful person. How could life be so unfair?
I feel like a bumbling food now. Somehow I feel like I have lost all my grace too. I am cognitively clumsy. I was never physically as graceful as you. I have always had cognitive grace though. I can't concentrate. My memory is shot and my attention span is nil.
Today I was chopping onions while remembering you dance, and I started bawling. And I know why. I am seeing your sister tomorrow. Tomorrow will confirm that it happened. You are no longer here and no matter how many letters I write to you. It's over.
You have no idea how painful that is.
I love you.
its not over. u'll see her sister and recall/share more awesome things about her which will stay with u forever surpassing all physical boundaries.
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